A Place to Rest & Reflect

This week i was surprised by the news that Forward Link, The Alumni Forum that has been a part of my experience with the Akimbo Workshops will be closing in December. i felt a sharp ping of disappointment and sadness. My acute reaction to that and other changes that have come into my awareness got me reflecting on the breadth of changes in the last 2 years.

Sometimes change is a big surprise, sometimes its an incremental transition. Sometimes you actively choose to create change and sometimes it’s happening without your conscious or direct involvement.

Unexpected change can be quite triggering in particular if you are already dealing with a lot of uncertainty (like the last 2 years). Contexts are important to note in terms of how we handle a given change.

What’s happening in the world? What’s around us, who are we engaged with? What state are they in? Even, what season of the year is it?

i notice i always feel a bit of sadness at the season change between summer and fall and again between fall and winter. Sadness, despite the fact that i love both those seasons. i know it will pass and once i’ve let go of the previous season, then i get into the new one. This year i noticed that feeling seemed particularly keen.

i’ve also been thinking about how human’s form strong bonds when they have gone through difficulty and loss together. Ie., veterans having survived the ravages of war, trauma survivors and in 12 step groups members come to mind.

When relationships develop or deepen during shared challenges, change to those relationships/groups can be triggering of grief that seem more painful than the immediate circumstance or cursory observation might indicate.

i wonder if these bonds formed of the shared experience of the tumultuous months of 2020 are part of my and others being so affected by the Akimbo forum closing.

Layers of different forms of change are going on in our lives all the time. Change happens…

It’s helpful for me to remember it’s the only enduring thing in life. That could seem bleak, but it’s not to me.

It reminds me to appreciate the present moment, the many wonderful rich connection’s i’ve made throughout my life and to understand they will change and evolve. To accept and allow feelings of grief when there is loss of a connection/relationship/familiar environment. Not so easy, but important. Thinking of the cycles of life also helps me to allow and move through grief and return to a sense of peace and delight with what is before me.

With the affects of these contexts in my awareness, i can give myself time to reflect, notice and allow whatever feelings come up and release. Then, i can move to a new place of possibility.

How are you dealing with the changes you are experiencing?

What story do you tell yourself about change and your ability to dance with it?

Is it a story you want to be telling or is there a new story you’d prefer to be living?

If so, what might it be?